Author Topic: The Guardian's 10 top Christmas Cracker "Jokes"  (Read 1827 times)

Offline admin

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3698
  • In the heart of Shropshire
    • Lydbury English Centre Ltd
The Guardian's 10 top Christmas Cracker "Jokes"
« on: December 12, 2017, 11:21:10 am »
1. Why was Theresa May sacked as nativity manager? She couldn’t run a stable government.
2. Why don’t Southern Rail train guards share advent calendars? They want to open the doors themselves.
3. What’s the difference between Ryanair and Santa? Santa flies at least once a year.
4. Kim Jong-un will play Santa this year in the South’s annual pantomime. He said he fancied a Korea change.
5. Why did Donald Trump continuously decorate the Christmas tree? Because people kept saying “moron” to him.
6. Why was the planned Ryanair TV documentary scrapped? They were unable to air a pilot.
7. Which TV Christmas special is being filmed in Brussels this year? Deal Or No Deal.
8. Theresa May has asked Santa for a home makeover this year. First thing on the list was a new cabinet.
9. What did Bruce Forsyth say when the Christmas pheasant repeated on him? “Good game, good game.”
10. Why did Jeremy Corbyn ask people not to eat sprouts on Christmas Day? He wants to give peas a chance.
Best wishes,

Duncan

Offline Britta

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 896
  • Technical writer
Re: The Guardian's 10 top Christmas Cracker "Jokes"
« Reply #1 on: December 12, 2017, 11:24:14 am »
 :o
If it's not used by a native speaker it's not idiomatic. And idiom trumps grammar every time. Jack Wilkerson†

Offline Bertha

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1154
Re: The Guardian's 10 top Christmas Cracker "Jokes"
« Reply #2 on: December 12, 2017, 11:31:09 am »
Ho. Ho. Ho.
Bertha

Offline t k

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1208
Re: The Guardian's 10 top Christmas Cracker "Jokes"
« Reply #3 on: December 13, 2017, 01:14:19 am »
4. Kim Jong-un will play Santa this year in the South’s annual pantomime. He said he fancied a Korea change.

I need help on this, please.  Thanks.  --- tk

Offline Britta

  • Administrator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 896
  • Technical writer
Re: The Guardian's 10 top Christmas Cracker "Jokes"
« Reply #4 on: December 13, 2017, 08:10:42 am »
 Korea change = career change
If it's not used by a native speaker it's not idiomatic. And idiom trumps grammar every time. Jack Wilkerson†